ALZO SLADE: The following program was taped in front of an audience of real live people.

BILL KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, This is WAIT, WAIT... DON'T TELL ME, the NPR News quiz. Who cares about those other medals? You just won the No-Bill Prize. I'm Bill Kurtis. And here is your host at the Studebaker Theatre at the Fine Arts Building in Chicago, Ill., Peter Sagal.

Thank you so much. We have such a great show for you lined up. Later on, we're going to be talking to the actor Ralph Macchio, forever associated with one role, Daniel LaRusso, "The Karate Kid." You know, that kind of held him back for a while. But recently he broke through back to stardom with a new role - Daniel LaRusso, the karate middle-aged man.

SAGAL: But first, we want to see if you can sweep our leg by taking our quiz. The number to call is 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. It's time to welcome our first listener contestant. Hi, you're on WAIT, WAIT... DON'T TELL ME.

JENNIFER WALCZAK: Hi. My name is Jennifer Walczak. I'm from Mechanicsburg, Penn.

SAGAL: Hey, Jennifer. So what do you do there in Mechanicsburg?

WALCZAK: I am a stay-at-home mom.

SAGAL: You are? And how old are your kids?

WALCZAK: I have one daughter, and she is 3 years old.

SAGAL: Three years old. And how do you find being home alone all day with a 3-year-old?

WALCZAK: Oh, it's really exciting.

SLADE: I can hear it.

SAGAL: It is. All that Cocomelon in one day. It's just...

SAGAL: ...Well, welcome to our show, Jennifer. Let me introduce you to our panel this week. First up, it's the host of "Dad Band Land," the podcast that obsesses over all the music you love from the point of view of a neighborhood cover band. It's Adam Felber.

SAGAL: Next up, the comedian who'll be performing at the Comedy Cellar in New York next week, it's Emmy Blotnick.

SAGAL: And the Peabody and three-time Emmy Award-winning vice correspondent and host of the podcast "Cheat!" - it's Alzo Slade.

SLADE: What's up Jennifer? How you doing?

WALCZAK: Good. How are you?

SLADE: So far, so good.

SAGAL: Well, Jennifer, welcome to the show. You're going to play Who's Bill This Time? Bill Kurtis is going to read you three quotations from this week's news. If you can correctly identify or explain just two of them, you will win our prize - any voice from our show you might choose on your voicemail. Are you ready to go?

SAGAL: Well, let's do it. Your first quote is from the president of the United States.

KURTIS: "You don't F with a Biden."

SAGAL: Now, that was the president. And we should say, you know, he did use the full expression, [expletive].

SLADE: Yes. Yes, he did.

SAGAL: Caught - he was caught on somebody's camera as he surveyed the damage where this week?

SAGAL: In Florida. Yeah. Somebody caught the president saying that, you don't F with the Bidens, to a mayor of one of the cities affected. And the mayor laughed and agreed with them. The mayor later said when he was asked about it that both he and Biden both use salty language because, you see, they are Irish Catholics. That explains why you always hear the pope say, let us F-ing pray.

SLADE: I feel like for you to have to say nobody Fs with a Biden, somebody's already F-ed with a Biden.

BLOTNICK: Yeah. People F with a Biden all the time. There are kids on TikTok looping him falling up the stairs, like, every day.

SLADE: Well, every last one of them is going to pay at some point.

SLADE: That's what he's saying.

FELBER: I love that idea of him as some sort of like, mob boss. It's like, oh, no, you've crossed Don Biden. Be careful. He's a hugger.

SAGAL: Oh, man, you're in deep malarkey now. Now, the other big story this week out of the Florida recovery is the tale of the bucket bunnies. Apparently - and this is all true - these electricity utility linemen who all descended on Florida to repair all the damage there, they all went to Florida, away from home, and got on Tinder. And their wives are not happy about this.

SLADE: I would think not.

SAGAL: Right. Yeah, I know. Now, the...

FELBER: And they're bucket bunnies.

SAGAL: Well, right. There are terms for this, right? So the wives of the linemen call themselves line wives. That's real. And they call these women who go after their husbands on the road either bucket bunnies or row hoes, also real terms. And they're the women who are trying to steal their pole pumpers.

SAGAL: That's not a real term. That's - should be, though.

FELBER: It's so wonderfully specific.

SAGAL: Pole pumpers. Well, we think - I mean, bucket bunnies.

BLOTNICK: You will call them electro-cuties or something?

SLADE: I feel like that's what they would call themselves, though.

SAGAL: This opens up a whole realm of profession-specific kink shaming.

FELBER: Yeah, I think we're blazing new trails.

FELBER: Like how about those plumber's helpers?

SLADE: I'm not going down this trail. I'm not going down...

FELBER: It's a whole new world. But you know...

SAGAL: Before the story, bucket bunnies is was most often associated with women who were sexually attracted to all four of Charlie Bucket's grandparents in that bed.

BLOTNICK: Now, two of them are buckets. The other two have changed their names.

SAGAL: I don't know. These people have been sitting there for all of this, and they're like, wait a minute. You don't mess...

SAGAL: ...With "Charlie And The Chocolate Factory." That's a classic. All right. Here is your next quote.

KURTIS: "The guinea pig is not living the best life he can."

SAGAL: That was somebody explaining why they're one of the many people who are now giving up the exotic pets they acquired during what?

SAGAL: Yeah, the pandemic. Right.

SAGAL: We've heard about, like, the dogs and cats pets, but shelters are reporting a 50% increase in people giving up their regrettable pandemic exotic pets - chickens, ducks, lizards and that lineman who appeared outside their house one day.

SAGAL: He was hungry. Did you guys get any pets during your - during the pandemic?

SLADE: Wait. Is a chicken an exotic pet?

BLOTNICK: I had the same question.

SAGAL: I mean, it depends where you are. On a farm, it's not exotic.

SLADE: I was about - that's disrespectful to farmers all across America.

SAGAL: Right. And like, in Soho...

BLOTNICK: I adopted a dog, and we're keeping him.

SAGAL: Right. You're not giving him back.

BLOTNICK: Yeah. No. We like him.

FELBER: Early in the pandemic, we got a lot of ants.

FELBER: Everybody eating in the house, all three meals every day.

SAGAL: Yeah. We already had two dogs, so we acquired a pandemic baby. And I don't know yet.

BLOTNICK: What's the return policy?

SAGAL: Yeah. It's weird, though, I mean, that all these exotic pets are coming back. Many of the animals being returned are mice and snakes, so it seems like there's an obvious solution here no one really wants to talk about...

BLOTNICK: Oh, you let the mice ride the snakes back to the shelter.

FELBER: That's right, Emmy. That's what it is.

SAGAL: That's what I mean, Emmy.

BLOTNICK: And then everyone's happy?

SAGAL: Yeah. And then they go to a - they all go to a farm upstate, Emmy. That's what's going to happen. All right. Here, Jennifer, is your last quote.

KURTIS: "Where's your crown now? You stole from everybody. Check every fish."

SAGAL: Those were shouts from a crowd angry about cheating in what kind of tournament this week?

WALCZAK: A fishing tournament (inaudible) Pennsylvania.

SAGAL: Yes, a fishing tournament.

SAGAL: Oh, my gosh. You are on top of this. Are you a fan of competitive fishing?

WALCZAK: No, I just watched the review on TikTok (inaudible)...

SAGAL: Oh, yes. It did go viral. The world of competitive fishing was rocked with scandal this week when a team competing in a big professional fishing tournament was caught stuffing their fish with lead weights to make the amount of their catch seem heavier. Organizers first suspected there was lead in the fish because of the fish's low standardized test scores and difficulty concentrating.

FELBER: But this is a pastime that's already associated with lying.

SAGAL: No one's ever exaggerated in fishing before.

FELBER: Right now, the judge who caught him is like, in a bar somewhere going like, the guys I caught were this big.

SAGAL: So this was discovered right there at the judging, and a large crowd surrounded the cheaters. It's all on video. And they shouted things like, arrest them and call the police. To which the police responded, what?

SLADE: Those dudes were pissed.

SAGAL: You cannot mess with the purity of professional fishing.

SLADE: I mean, they were pissed. Just imagine how pissed the fish were. They were like, dude, I think I ate something funny.

SAGAL: Now, I don't know if you guys knew this. Obviously, this one went viral this week, but as long as there has been professional big-money fishing, which has been a while, there has been cheating scandals. One thing that these guys like to do is they like to, like, load up their - the place in the boat where they keep their catch with fish pre-trip, right? So they pre-load it with fish. There was one guy who would have got away with like, $100,000 if he hadn't included four Filet-O-Fish sandwiches in there.

FELBER: Oh, yeah. That's a giveaway when you try to submit one of those at the end.

BLOTNICK: Oh, yeah. If it's breaded, the judges are like...

SAGAL: Pretty much. They're very suspicious. Bill, how did Jennifer do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Jennifer, I hope you had fun because we did. You did really well.

WALCZAK: Thank you. Thank you.

(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "FISHIN' IN THE DARK")

NITTY GRITTY DIRT BAND: (Singing) Lazy yellow moon coming up tonight, shining through the trees...

SAGAL: All right, panel, we have some questions for you from the week's news. Alzo, in an op-ed published this week, a family psychologist bravely took a stand against doing what to your child?

SAGAL: No. Well, I mean, look at it this way. Think of the damage to a child's psyche when they realize up top isn't that far up.

SLADE: What, they don't let them sleep in bunk beds?

SAGAL: You've never done up top?

SLADE: Oh, a high five?

SAGAL: A high five, yes.

SAGAL: He recommended against high-fiving your children.

SLADE: No, no, no, no. Hold on. Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

SLADE: Wait a minute. What is wrong with high-fiving?

SAGAL: Well, I shall explain, or rather, I will quote him explaining. Psychologist John Rosemond explained in his op-ed, quote, "the high five is a gesture of familiarity to be shared between equals," unquote, and children, he pretty much says, are beneath him. What happened to this man that when he sees a child, his first thought is establish dominance?

SLADE: That dude had no high fives as a kid.

SAGAL: And if you have any doubt that this guy is not a loser, he's a cool guy, he literally says in the article, and he proves it by saying, quote, "I have traded the palm slap with adult friends."

BLOTNICK: Why is that so gross?

FELBER: That sounds much dirtier than it is.

SAGAL: Now, you may be wondering, why should I take advice from this guy? Well...

FELBER: I wasn't wondering that.

(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "HIGH FIVE ANXIETY")

NERF HERDER: (Singing) High five anxiety, high five anxiety. Don't raise your hand. Don't look at me. High five anxiety...

SAGAL: Coming up, whatever you do, don't eat your vegetables. It's our Bluff the Listener game. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to play. We'll be back in a minute with more of WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME from NPR.

KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Kurtis. We are playing this week with Alzo Slade, Emmy Blotnick and Adam Felber.

KURTIS: And here again is your host at the Studebaker Theater in Chicago, Ill., Peter Sagal.

SAGAL: Thank you, Bill. Thank you, everybody. Thank you.

SAGAL: Right now, it's time for the WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME Bluff the Listener game. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to play our game on the air. Hi, you're on WAIT WAIT.... DON'T TELL ME.

JAMIE VAN CLIEF: Hi. This is Jamie van Clief (ph) calling in from Asheville, N.C.

SAGAL: Out there in the mountains of western North Carolina. What do you do there?

VAN CLIEF: I'm a regional field scientist with the American Chestnut Foundation.

SAGAL: So, I mean, I assume you're referring to chestnut trees, right?

VAN CLIEF: Yes. They are a functionally extinct species.

SAGAL: But on the streets of New York this winter, there will be hundreds of people roasting chestnuts. Are you telling me that's a fraud?

VAN CLIEF: Those are going to be European or Chinese chestnuts.

SLADE: Oh, we can't have those.

SAGAL: Well, Jamie, welcome to the show. You're going to play the game in which you must try to tell truth from fiction. Bill, what is Jamie's topic?

KURTIS: It ain't easy being green.

SAGAL: Vegetables, the strange things that go between your hamburger patty and the bun, always get praised. We're always told how great they are, but it turns out they have their problems as well. Our panelists are going to tell you about a vegetable struggling with some bad PR. Pick the one who's telling the truth, you'll win our prize, the voice of your voice on your voicemail. Ready to play?

SAGAL: All right, let's do it. First, let's hear from Adam Felber.

FELBER: This Halloween, folks in some southern states are having to contend with a brand-new horror - exploding pumpkins. Stay with me, folks. Here's what's happening. The combination of our warming climate and Halloween season starting so early means pumpkins are being grown in unusual heat, and that has given birth to a new bacteria that gets inside developing pumpkins, feasts on the pulp and releases methane. Once-peaceful pumpkin patches are peppered with occasional pops, booms and the whine of what can only be described as squeaky, noxious pumpkin farts.

FELBER: Not all is lost. There are already reports of eager teens in Georgia and Texas playing a kind of Russian roulette where they take turns rapping pumpkins with a stick, which proves the old adage, when life gives you foul-smelling, exploding pumpkins, make foul-smelling, exploding pumpkin-ade.

SAGAL: That pumpkin you were hoping to carve into a jack-o-lantern might explode and get you first. Your next story of a vexed veg comes from Emmy Blotnick.

BLOTNICK: Everybody knows that kale is very good for you, but if you think it tastes like an old, wet envelope, you're not alone. According to a new study, we hate the taste of kale even before we're born. Using 4D ultrasound technology, fetuses in the womb are seen to have noticeable facial reactions to flavors their mothers have eaten. Researchers compared photos of the fetus before, at RBF, resting baby face...

BLOTNICK: ...As well as after, after the mother has eaten kale, when the fetus is seen crumpling its face in disgust. They also found that when the mother eats deep dish pizza, the fetus lowers its sunglasses and says, oh, yeah.

BLOTNICK: Of course, this news comes as a devastating blow to big kale, which has spent the last decade in vain trying to replace lettuce in salads. A spokesperson for kale denies that its bitter leaves were to blame for all the grossed-out babies and insists that this study is actually stealth opposition research funded by rival greens, collard and chard.

SAGAL: A study proving that babies - even babies in the womb don't like the taste of kale. Your last story of produce problems comes from Alzo Slade.

SLADE: Most of us know Popeye the sailor man to gain superhuman strength from eating spinach. But recently, people are starting to see spinach as a catfishing vegetable. It doesn't matter if you cook a truckload or a pot full of it. Once you heat it up, it shrivels to just a bottle cap portion of limp and soggy leaves.

SLADE: With most of America clinging to this notion that spinach develops strength, Black scientists have known for quite some time that spinach was a phony, taking the credit of another leaf, the collard green. A new collection of studies from researchers at historically Black universities looking at the perseverance and strength of the Black community throughout history shows in both good times and bad, the collard green was present to provide much-needed sustenance. When asked why there is no correlation between other communities and the sustenance of collard greens, the scientists replied, seasoning.

SLADE: Responding to this research, this week, Sony Pictures revealed that in an upcoming Popeye reboot, he'll be eating collard greens instead of spinach, and his new sidekick, Black Guy, will introduce the world to a magnificent pea.

SAGAL: All right. So here are your choices of a story of bad news for some vegetable. Was it from Adam Felber, that some pumpkins are actually exploding on people, from Emmy Blotnick, that kale tastes so bad that even babies in the womb don't like it, or from Alzo Slade, that spinach is fired by Popeye and from now on, that sailor will get his strength from collard greens? Which of these is the real story of vegetable troubles in the news?

VAN CLIEF: I think I'm going to have to go with the story about the kale.

SAGAL: You're going to go with the story - Emmy's story about the kale, that babies don't like it even before they're born. Well, OK. Now, to bring you the correct answer, we actually spoke to someone who helped discover this particular vegetable problem.

NADJA REISSLAND: We have kale and carrots, so something bitter, something non-bitter, and then see whether we see different types of facial expressions in the fetus.

SAGAL: That was Nadja Reissland.

SAGAL: She is a psychologist at Durham University, and she helped determine just how early on in our lives we hate kale. Congratulations, Jamie. You got it right. You earned a point for Emmy.

SAGAL: And you've won our prize.

VAN CLIEF: Oh, my gosh. Thank you guys so much.

SAGAL: Yeah, you've won the voice of our choice on your answering machine. Thank you so much for playing.

THE BEACH BOYS: (Singing) I'm going to be 'round my vegetables. I'm going to chow down my vegetables. I love you most of all.

SAGAL: And now, the game where we get to talk to the heroes of our youth and try to make them heroes of our present. In 1984, at the age of 22, actor Ralph Macchio became the most famous 16-year-old in the world, Daniel LaRusso, the Karate Kid. Two sequels and then 30 years later, Ralph has returned to the role as the adult Daniel LaRusso in the hit Netflix series "Cobra Kai." He's got a new memoir out soon called "Waxing On: The Karate Kid And Me," and he joins us now. Ralph Macchio, welcome to WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME.

RALPH MACCHIO: Thank you, man. Love the intro.

SAGAL: Well, I want you to know, in case you were bothered by people coming up to you and just immediately bringing up "The Karate Kid," I had not seen the movie until this week. True story.

SAGAL: Really. So if I'd run into you, I'd be like, oh, my God. Oh, my God, it's you from "Crossroads." So, you know.

MACCHIO: That's right. There you go.

SAGAL: There you go. You know.

MACCHIO: Yeah. No, I listened, audible gasp from the - there are, you know...

SAGAL: No, I was the last one in captivity, and now there are no more people who have never seen it.

SLADE: How did you not see the Karate Kid?

SLADE: Did you not go to the VHS rental store, pick it out, watch it, be kind, rewind, return it so someone else could be blessed with this film?

SAGAL: Well, here's the thing.

SAGAL: And I think Ralph will know what I'm talking about. So I missed it. I must have been busy the night it was out. I'm sorry. Anyway - and by the time I was like, oh, I should see that movie, it had become so popular and suffused popular culture that I felt I had seen it.

MACCHIO: Right. The pop culture of it all became, like, you know, your snapshot into, like - it's like when you see a good - when you see a trailer to a movie and it's such a great trailer, and then you hear from someone about it, like, one or two more - then you're like, I've seen the trailer. That has the best jokes. This guy just said this guy wins at the end. I don't really have to...

SAGAL: Exactly. And then when I saw the movie, I was so surprised. It's more than 30 seconds long. And - actually, my biggest surprise in the movie was Pat Morita, the wonderful actor who plays Mr. Miyagi, was, when you made the movie, six years younger than I am now, which is a little terrifying.

MACCHIO: I know. I know. Believe me, there are memes of that.

MACCHIO: Worse for me than you.

SAGAL: Yeah, I guess. In fact, I wanted to ask you about that before we go back. So let's go back to 1984. You were - and for those of you who weren't there, even I knew this - you were like, huge. You were, like, in the cover of Tiger Beat.

MACCHIO: Yes, I was on.

MACCHIO: I was on those pinnacle, like, Vogue, GQ, Tiger Beat. Yes, go on.

SAGAL: For our younger listeners, Tiger Beat was something that was called a magazine.

MACCHIO: Yes. That's a thing you turn. They have these shiny kind of pages.

MACCHIO: My funny - here's a story. Here's a good story. My son - my kids didn't sort of know that Daddy's, like, not like all the other dads kind of thing when they were younger, till he found at age - I think it was four or six - a bin that my mother kept with every single Tiger Beat, 16, Teen Bop, Baby Bop, whatever. He comes running in the house with, like, fistfuls of these teen magazines to his older sister and says, Dad was huge and we missed it.

SAGAL: That's amazing. And then did he say like, dad, what do you mean - you were the Karate Kid, just like Jaden Smith?

MACCHIO: Not quite. That hadn't happened yet.

SLADE: You know, see - see, that's a cute story and all - right? - Ralph, but I got something I need to express to you, bro.

SLADE: Like, you're woven into the fabric of my formative years. Like, you're a hero back in the day. I got to tell you, bro, that crane kick don't work in real life.

SLADE: Yo, I'm going to tell you, y'all should've put a disclaimer at the beginning and the end of the film, because Jason Taylor (ph) at Cobb Middle School kicked my ass when I was trying to do that crane kick. Jason Taylor ain't care nothing about no crane kick. Ain't no wax-on. He waxed me. That's what he did.

MACCHIO: He just needed a human Yoda like my character had to help. Yeah.

SLADE: I needed somebody to yell cut, before...

SAGAL: All right. I got one more question for you before you play your game, which is that among many other privileges of being the Karate Kid, you had one of the great training montage songs of all time written for you, "You're The Best Around," right? And do you - is that, like - do you ever, like, use that when you're out for a jog because it's yours? Whenever you're feeling a little down, you got to get that burst of energy, you just, like, play that?

MACCHIO: I will say this much in full disclosure. This could be the first time I'm saying it out loud in front of 500 of my best friends that I can't see. In recent times on the Long Island expressway when I am cooking, it's heating up, I'm cranking that mofo.

SLADE: Awesome. Can you imagine? Imagine pulling up next to Ralph Macchio.

SAGAL: You hear the song and you turn your head and there's Ralph Macchio, like, banging on the steering wheel, singing along.

MACCHIO: No, when I have to do it, I got to call you guys when I'm driving a '27 Ford convertible.

SAGAL: No, you got to do the thing where people put their phones and film themselves from the dashboard doing it, just rocking out to "You're The Best." Oh, that would be hilarious.

MACCHIO: One of these days. Maybe when "Cobra Kai" comes in for a landing, that'll be my victory...

SAGAL: That'll be awesome. Well, Ralph, it is so great to talk to you, but we have asked you here to play a game we're calling...

KURTIS: Wax On, Wax Off.

SAGAL: Your character learned karate - famously - by waxing Mr. Miyagi's cars. So we thought we'd ask about a different use for wax hair removal. Answer 2 out of 3 questions about the job we just learned is called an esthetician, and you'll win our prize for one of our listeners. Bill, who is Ralph Macchio playing for?

KURTIS: Bryan Hill (ph) of Orlando, Fla.

SAGAL: Well, here is your first question. One of the most memorable waxings ever, of course, is Steve Carell's chest-waxing scene in the movie "The 40-Year-Old Virgin." The scene had a visceral impact on viewers. How did they make it so realistic? A - they applied mild electric shocks to Carell every time they pulled off the fake hair. B - every time the waxer pulled off the fake hair, the sound effects editor put in the sound of Velcro being pulled apart. Or C - it wasn't fake hair. They really ripped Steve Carell's chest hair out on camera.

MACCHIO: Audience feels like it's B, huh?

SAGAL: No, no, no, no. The audience feels like it's C.

MACCHIO: Yeah. I feel like it's C, too, because I think I've heard Carell tell the story.

SAGAL: There you are. It is C.

SAGAL: They did it for real. They did it for real. It's one take because you can't wait to grow the hair back for take two.

SAGAL: All right. With so many licensed waxers out there, it is important for salons to get their names out there in front of the public. But one waxer in Australia faced controversy after posting promotional photos of them doing what? A - giving a bikini wax to a real crocodile. B - wearing used wax strips like a beard. Or C - waxing the feet of a hobbit.

SAGAL: People are shouting C again, but this time I think they're just messing with you.

MACCHIO: I think it's going to be - I think it's B.

MACCHIO: I think it's B.

SAGAL: You think wearing the used wax strips like a beard. No, actually it was A. He had pictured himself waxing an actual crocodile, which we did not know had body hair.

SLADE: But you said bikini wax the crocodile.

FELBER: Yeah. They don't have crotches.

BLOTNICK: They don't have bikinis.

SAGAL: Yes. But crocodiles all wear one pieces. We all know this.

MACCHIO: You show me one - you show you bring me one crocodile, bikini and I'll...

SAGAL: I'll - we'll believe it. All right. Well, nonetheless, nonetheless, well, this is very exciting because, as we all know from the movie, you do your best when you're down to the last chance, right? OK.

SLADE: Don't use that damn crane kick, though.

MACCHIO: Keep your hands in front of your face.

MACCHIO: Yeah. And just run.

SAGAL: All right. Here's your last question. Millions of people get waxed because they like the way it makes them look. But the prevalence of waxing around, well, the world has had an unexpected benefit. What? A - the average pair of underwear now lasts six months longer. B - it lowered the retail price of Crayola crayons - more wax available. Or C - it's officially made crab lice an endangered species.

MACCHIO: Oh, man. I'm going with C.

SAGAL: You're right. That's what happened.

SAGAL: And I got to tell you I did not believe this myself when I first heard it, but I looked it up. And there has been, in fact, an academic paper proving that these parasitic animals who like to live in human body hair have becoming endangered because there's less body hair for them to live in. It's true. Bill, how did Ralph Macchio do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Ralph has won the tournament with 2 out of 3. That's a win, Ralph.

SAGAL: Ralph Macchio stars in "Cobra Kai" on Netflix. You can pre-order his memoir "Waxing On" right now. Ralph Macchio, what a joy to talk to you. Thank you so much for joining us on WAIT, WAIT... DON'T TELL ME.

MACCHIO: Had a good time.

(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "YOU'RE THE BEST AROUND")

JOE ESPOSITO: (Singing) You're the best around. Nothing's going to ever keep you down. You're the best around. Nothing's going to ever keep you down.

SAGAL: In just a minute, Bill offers you a greasy treat in our Listener Limerick Challenge. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to join us on the air. We'll be back in a minute with more of WAIT, WAIT... DON'T TELL ME from NPR.

KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is WAIT, WAIT... DON'T TELL ME!, the NPR news quiz. I'm Bill Kurtis. We are playing this week with Adam Felber, Alzo Slade and Emmy Blotnick. And here, again, is your host at the Studebaker Theater in Chicago, Ill., Peter Sagal.

SAGAL: Thank you, Bill. In just a minute, Bill vacuums his house with a Rhyme-ba. It's our Listener Limerick Challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Right now, panel, some more questions for you from the week's news. Emmy, shocking new research says there's a reason why men learn to play extreme heavy metal guitar. They want to impress whom?

BLOTNICK: Their fathers? What's the guy from - James Hetfield? Who should I say here?

SAGAL: Like, all the men learning to play - you're actually - I'm going to give it to you because the answer is they're trying to impress other men.

SAGAL: Which is not what you might think. Right? This week, scientists proved why men learn to play extreme heavy metal guitar - because it sounds great. Just kidding. No. According to the study, men learn to play that style of guitar, extreme heavy metal, to impress other men. Turns out this is true. Part - a big part of the reason people learn to play music is to attract a mate. But heterosexual women really do not like extreme heavy metal. So the men who play that are just doing it to impress and maybe intimidate other heterosexual men.

SLADE: I got a lot of homeboys.

SLADE: And none of them have ever played heavy metal in order to ingratiate themselves with me.

FELBER: They're not your real friends, Alzo.

SAGAL: Are you feeling a little bitter?

FELBER: They're not your real-life friends.

SAGAL: Are you going to go confront them?

FELBER: But as a guy who plays keyboard in a band, I can tell you that that's the instrument you play if you want your bandmates to never think of you at all.

SAGAL: So they're introducing the band. And we got Jeff on guitar. We got Bob on drums. And - wait, you're here?

FELBER: What do you do?

FELBER: We've been playing with you guys for 15 years.

SAGAL: Alzo, McDonald's has just announced a major change to their menu. They'll now be offering, for a limited time, a brand-new Happy Meal for whom?

SAGAL: Yes. It's part of a promotion with a fashion brand, and it is supposed to bring back childhood memories of your parents finally giving up and taking you to McDonald's again.

SLADE: So an old folks' Happy Meal.

SAGAL: The prize? Well, that's interesting.

SAGAL: No, just like the ones for kids, but the toys are, like, reimagined versions of the old characters. So, for example, it's Ron McDonald now.

BLOTNICK: Is my mother dating him? Why is he...

SAGAL: The Hamburglar, now the Hambezzler.

SAGAL: And grimace is now Grimace Every time I Stand Up.

BLOTNICK: Did they make the ball pits deeper...

BLOTNICK: ...For grown-ups? No? It's very sad when a tall person is in a shallow ball pit...

SAGAL: I was about to say...

SAGAL: Emmy, a new food craze might be heading our way soon. KFCs overseas are offering fried chicken but with what new flavor dipping sauce.

BLOTNICK: Is it like - I feel like it's going to be something gross. Is it like caramel, butterscotch? Help. Why is every one of these questions a complete meltdown for me?

SAGAL: Speaking of meltdowns, this could just be the melted ice cream flavor.

SAGAL: Yeah. I'll give it to you - specifically, mint chocolate.

SAGAL: Oh, yes. The mint chocolate craze is everywhere in South Korea. You can get burgers with mint chocolate hand lotion that's scented with it, soup, toothpaste.

SAGAL: The mint chocolate chicken dipping sauce, mint chocolate and chicken combined. Do they not have NyQuil over there?

BLOTNICK: That is such an - I mean, will I try it? Yeah. If it's offered? Yes.

FELBER: Oh, sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SAGAL: ...You may not have to because The Wall Street Journal, daily diary of the American dream - when they spoke to people who were really into it and they tried it, said one diehard mint chocolate fan, quote, "I didn't have high expectations going in. And upon trying it, it tasted bad."

SAGAL: Another really big fan of the flavor said, quote, "I'm not sure this should be allowed."

SLADE: Wait. You all said you would try it?

BLOTNICK: I think if somebody was like, will you try this? I got nothing else to do, you know?

SLADE: I got plenty other stuff to do.

BLOTNICK: It's more fathomable to me than buying an adult Happy Meal so I can give myself a toy.

DANNY BROWN: (Singing) Dip, I dip, you dip. Dip, I dip, you dip, I dip. Dip, I dip, you dip. Dip, I dip, you dip, I dip. Dip, you dip, I dip...

SAGAL: Coming up, it's Lightning Fill in the Blank, but first, it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme. If you'd like to play on air, call or leave a message at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Or you can click the contact us link on our website, waitwait.npr.org. You can catch us here most weeks at the beautiful Studebaker Theater in downtown Chicago, and we'll be at Carnegie Hall in New York City December 8 and 9. Also, you can catch the Wait Wait! Stand-Up Tour coming to Kalamazoo, Mich., and Portland and Eugene, Ore., quite soon. More information and tickets for all of that is on nprpresents.org. Hi, you're on WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME!

LINDA: Well, hello there. This is Linda (ph).

SAGAL: Hey, Linda. Where are you calling from?

LINDA: From the far western corner of Western Maryland, Deep Creek Lake area. The name of the town's Accident, and right now I am...

SAGAL: Hold on, I missed it earlier. What is the name of the town?

SAGAL: The name of the town that you live in is actually Accident, Md.

SAGAL: OK. So I have to ask you, is there a story of how Accident, Md., got named?

LINDA: Long ago when the king sent his surveyors and two surveyors said, here's the perfect place, and they were both in the same place by accident. And so it's a perfect place to live.

FELBER: It wasn't just somebody was looking for On Purpose and made the wrong turn.

SAGAL: Right. Well, Linda, welcome to the show. Bill Kurtis is going to read for you three news-related limericks with the last word or phrase missing from each. If you can fill in that last word or phrase correctly in two of the limericks, you'll be a winner. Here is your first limerick.

KURTIS: A meat spread has far too much clutter, and cheese makes my ventricles flutter. I'll serve up a spread that goes well with some bread. I'm serving a platter of...

LINDA: There's a shortage of butter.

SAGAL: Yes, it's butter - very good.

SAGAL: Butter boards, the latest culinary trend - perfect for anyone who thinks, you know what would be great? A charcuterie board, but slimy. So a butter board, for those who haven't seen it yet - it's essentially you take an entire stick of butter, you smear it on a cutting board, and then you cover it in the toppings of your choice - honey, lemon zest, or if you're a freak, margarine. It's not to be confused, though, with butterboarding (ph), which is how the CIA gets someone in Wisconsin to talk.

SLADE: So what - there's butter only?

SAGAL: Well, it's butter, and then you mix in things to the butter to make it sort of zesty or seasoned or flavored, and then you put it in front of your guests, and they presumably run in horror, and you don't have to spend any more money on entertaining them.

SLADE: I'd say that's just as useless as a charcuterie board.

SAGAL: Charcuterie boards are great. What's wrong with charcuterie?

SLADE: No, they're not. You put - no, charcuterie boards are weird.

SLADE: Salami, cheese, grapes and pickles.

SAGAL: Yeah, we're all for it. Yeah.

SLADE: I mean, you might as well throw some chocolate mint sauce in there.

SAGAL: You like to keep your meats separate from your grapes, is what you're saying?

BLOTNICK: It sounds like you just want someone to make you a sandwich.

FELBER: It's a cry for help.

SAGAL: All right, here is your next limerick.

KURTIS: It's silly string with more finesse, but the runway is still quite a mess. We use cans of spray then cut excess away, and voila. Now we have a tight...

SAGAL: The Coperni fashion show last weekend ended with a nearly naked supermodel, Bella Hadid, standing motionless while a dress was spray-painted onto her body. This wasn't just, you know, like, body paint. No. It was this special compound that solidified into a rubbery fabric that completely covered her. Then the spider came out to take its meal.

SAGAL: And then once it was, like, shaped and cut a little bit, it was this actual dress that looked great on supermodel Bella Hadid. So anybody who is supermodel Bella Hadid should be very excited about this coming to market.

SLADE: And then Bella - right as it was sprayed on and solidified, Bella was like, I got to pee.

SAGAL: I mean, it's very great for Bella. I myself am waiting for someone to come up with the spray-on baggy sweatshirt. All right, here is your last limerick.

KURTIS: This travel trend doesn't come cheap. For counting, hotels keep live sheep. Cooled pillows let guests get some good calming rest. Folks will travel to get some good...

SAGAL: You said sleep. Yes, exactly.

SAGAL: Now you can enjoy a custom-designed sleep vacation. This isn't just how you explain a coma to a 5-year-old. It's real. Apparently, vacations designed for people who just want to sleep are on the rise, with hotels creating special sleep-centric rooms. They're like regular hotel rooms but not next to the elevator.

BLOTNICK: Sounds like you give them the butter board, and then here's your sleep vacation.

SAGAL: Exactly right. Bill, how did Linda do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Linda, you got them all right, and it was by Accident.

SAGAL: Congratulations, Linda. Take care. Thanks for playing.

LINDA: Thank you all so much. Love you (ph).

SAGAL: Now on to our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as they can. Each correct answer is worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

KURTIS: Emmy has four. Alzo has two. And Adam has one.

SAGAL: So, Adam, you're in third place. You know what that means. You go first.

SAGAL: Here we go. On Wednesday, President Biden and Ron DeSantis vowed to work together to help blank recover from Hurricane Ian.

SAGAL: On Thursday, Twitter asked a court in Delaware to proceed with an upcoming trial against blank.

SAGAL: This week, a judge in Michigan dismissed charges against seven people involved in blank's water scandal.

SAGAL: On Wednesday, OPEC announced plans to slash blank production.

SAGAL: On Monday, Gavin Newsom officially signed a law decriminalizing blank in California.

FELBER: It's a good day for me.

SAGAL: On Tuesday, New York Yankee blank hit his record-breaking 62nd home run.

SAGAL: According to a new poll, the majority of Americans don't plan on getting a blank shot this season.

SAGAL: No, a flu shot. This week, Arnold Schwarzenegger stirred up some controversy when he signed his catchphrase...

SAGAL: I'll be back, into the guestbook at blank.

FELBER: The Holiday Inn in Tacoma.

SAGAL: No, he signed I'll be back next to his signature at the guest book at Auschwitz.

SAGAL: The former governor visited the memorial at the invitation of the organization that runs it, and he signed the museum's guestbook with his trademark line from "The Terminator," I'll be back. People were upset, but the organization assured everyone, well, it had been just a quick visit and he literally meant that he wanted to come back. Makes sense, because if there's one place you definitely can't wait to return to, it's Auschwitz.

FELBER: Well, at least he didn't go with any of his Mr. Freeze catchphrases.

FELBER: (Imitating Arnold Schwarzenegger) Chill, OK?

SAGAL: Bill, how did Adam do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Adam got six right for 12 more points, total of 13. Gives him the lead.

SAGAL: Alzo, you are up next. Fill in the blank. On Thursday, President Biden announced he was pardoning thousands of federal convictions for blank possession.

SAGAL: For the first time ever, the U.S. national blank rose above $31 trillion.

SAGAL: I'll give it to you. Debt.

SAGAL: This week, a not-yet-built development in the desert of Saudi Arabia won a bid to host the 2029 blanks.

SAGAL: No, the 2029 Asian Winter Games. On Tuesday, country legend blank passed away at the age of 91.

SAGAL: This week, a couple in Brazil was arrested...

SAGAL: ...After they blanked for their gender reveal party.

SAGAL: No, they dyed an entire waterfall blue. The couple was filming for the entire party, including the part where the waterfall behind them, which feeds directly into a main water source for the town below, turned a shocking baby blue. It's all part of the new gender reveal trend where you know the baby is a boy based on how many townspeople you poison. Bill, how did Alzo do on our quiz?

KURTIS: He got three right, six more points, total of eight. Adam still leads.

SAGAL: All right. So how many, then, does Emmy Blotnick need to win?

SAGAL: That's not too big. Here we go, Emmy. This is for the game. On Tuesday, Donald Trump asked the Supreme Court to intervene in the review of documents seized from blank.

SAGAL: Despite international outcry, blank has continued its series of missile tests.

BLOTNICK: Iran? No, North Korea.

SAGAL: Yeah, right. OK, I'll give it to you. North Korea.

SAGAL: On Wednesday, a jury found the chief of security for rideshare giant blank guilty of covering up a data breach.

SAGAL: This week, one enthusiastic fan at the Desert Days Music Festival in California started blanking on the other attendees.

SAGAL: No, he started grating cheese on them. No one knows why.

BLOTNICK: Of course, of course.

SAGAL: On Monday, the SEC fined Kim Kardashian for encouraging her followers on Instagram to buy blank without revealing it was a paid...

SAGAL: On Thursday, French writer Annie Ernaux was awarded the blank prize in literature.

SAGAL: Yes. This week, a woman in Scotland posted an ad for a free coffin online...

SAGAL: ...Saying she didn't need it anymore because blank.

BLOTNICK: She's going to live forever.

SAGAL: No, she didn't need the coffin because, quote, "My husband has lived longer than I hoped," unquote.

SAGAL: We've all been there. Not in the coffin, dammit. The woman posted the free coffin on Facebook Marketplace along with a note that said, quote, "Bought it for my husband, but he's lived much longer than I hoped," unquote, which definitely is another way of saying when buying slow-acting poison, always ask how slow. Bill, did Emmy Blotnick do well enough to win?

KURTIS: She racked up five, 10 more points. Total of 14 gives her the win.

SAGAL: Bask in it. Bask in it, Emmy.

SAGAL: Now, panel, what will be the next big scandal in fishing? Adam Felber.

FELBER: A steroid scandal is uncovered when someone catches a trout that has enormously muscular thighs.

BLOTNICK: Fishermen are claiming their catch comes with your choice of baked potato, rice or salad, when, in fact, all three cost extra.

SLADE: They're dressing up tilapia to look like Chilean sea bass.

KURTIS: If any of that happens, we'll ask you about it on WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME.

SAGAL: Thank you, Bill Kurtis.

SAGAL: Thanks also to Adam Felber, Emmy Blotnick and Alzo Slade. Thanks to our fabulous audience here at the Studebaker Theater in downtown Chicago, Ill. Thanks to all of you out there for listening wherever you are. I'm Peter Sagal. We'll see you next week.

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